Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the freakshow!

It’s senseless,
I’m breathless,
I just can’t do it all again.
I can’t stop
These arrows;
They’re screaming through my brain.

Wasting away,
Every single day,
Such pain is nothing you could know.
This madness,
This chaos,
They’re seeds that only I have sown.

I have no clue,
Teach me.
I cannot feel,
Show me.
I cannot forget…
Kill me,
For I don’t deserve to be.

Take it all away,
Rip my soul to pieces.
I’ll relive this day
Beyond eternity.

You wasted
Your hatred
On everything but me.
Now watch me
Destroy myself,
‘Coz now there’s nothing I can be.

Keep dreaming,
I’m screaming,
The nightmares will never fade.
Shut your ears
To my pained cries;
I’ll never fuck you up again.

I want to bleed,
But I have no body.
I want to think,
But I have no mind.
I want to feel,
But I have no soul.
I.
I am…
I
Am not.

What I’d give
For one moment
Of silence.
Everyday,
Fragments,
Meaningless words,
Images, dreams.
Shhh…
They won’t shut up.
No one listens.
Neither do i.
Cold. Always.
It’s a long wait.
But I don’t care.
Can’t.
And everything
Hurts.
Nothing’s wrong,
We know that.
Why can’t you all
Just fuck off…
Do you want me
Begging?
I’m on my knees.
Stop.
Why? No, what for?
What’s the point? How come?
Screams, cries…
Blood, tears…
A waste.
Spinning.
Fast. Slow. Fast.
The remote doesn’t work.
Fuck.
It’s never
Ever
Ever
Ever
Going
To…

Prophetic dreams,
Now a distant whisper.
Body fades to dust.
Mind, a dull aftertaste.
Soul lingers for a moment,
Then dies
Like a candle’s flame,
Or like hope.

All is gone,
So what remains?
The void,
The overflowing cup
Of nothingness.
Yet nothingness is a thing.
So if even no thing is some thing,
Then everything is nothing.

Nothing even really dies,
Nothing ever really begins.
Birth and death and mere transitions
Like water into ice.
So what is it to be?
Nothing. And everything.
All things are part
Of one, ever-turning wheel.

Woe.
Day has turned now
To Night.
Tis the end.
What ho?
The sun rises!
Tis a new day.
Rejoice.

You live your life
By the words of a book,
And it’s words
That you’ve put your faith in.
How can you say
That I’ve forgotten God,
When you don’t even know
Who God is?

You, who call yourself
A child of God,
Are nothing but a hypocrite,
Born of ignorance,
Born of lies,
And caged by the
Dreams of blind faith.

You only believe
In what you hear,
Not in what you feel.
Don’t bow your head
In prayer for me,
For it’s you who needs to see.
Hypocrite,
How dare you judge me?